Our Florida Vacation

Great dating makes great mating!

Jess and I had a fun date yesterday! I can't wait to share what we did. We are so lucky to have relatives just a couple of doors away in both directions in our little cul-de-sac, so we hardly ever have to pay for babysitting.

Well, I took over the date. I told Jess to just make sure to keep his Saturday afternoon/evening free because I had a surprise date for him. We went to Il Vicino oven-fired pizza restaurant and right next to that is Cocoa Dolce, the BEST chocolate you've EVER had. If you ever want to impress somebody, get them this chocolate.

Then, we drove home and on the kitchen table I set up some paints and canvases. We painted each other's portraits! It was a blast--we laughed and made fun of ourselves and each other. It actually kind of felt like that dating-before-marriage feeling.

I'm learning that stepping out of the rent-a-movie routine, or even the restaurant-and-then-a-movie routine, yields a lot more fun. We just had gotten into a rut and it was fun to be more spontaneous.

The kids like our portraits, do you?

What's so bad?

The following is a response to a kind friend who tried to "buoy" me up. You see, I've been down for the last two weeks. No reason, just down.

Jess has gone through this with me so many times it's just really, really old. We just have an understanding now. If we were really organized we could say, Hey, I'm having a #16 day and he would go, "Oh, well, that's too bad. I love you," and basically, "let me know when you're over it."

Now that makes him look really bad, but you have to understand that this man adores me. Honestly, I'm convinced I don't deserve him. He simply has finally learned that he can't fix me and he can't make it all better. More importantly, he knows that only I can pull myself out of those kinds of moods. In fact, with this last episode he looked at me kindly and asked, "What's so bad?"

So this friend that emailed me, poor girl, is fresh meat. Here's my response to her in {}. *I've edited for privacy and clarity.

{Awww, bless you for that! I really enjoyed our visit this afternoon. You're one of those friends that I would love to sit on the back porch and spend a whole day with!
I thank you for your kind comments.
But see, I beg to differ. I am not accomplished. I have no degree, no marketable skills, I have character flaws that most people want to run away screaming and pulling their hair out after working with me on a project (I can give you references...)

I'm great at making babies, only it takes me 2 years to get over it the hormonal and psychological anguish. Or is it 5? ;)

I love being a mom but I can only see all my flaws as a mom. All the missed opportunities to say the right thing, the temper flare-ups, the impatience, the dirty house, the poor example I set with eating, the poor example I set managing money, my lack of involvement at the school...I could go on. Or did I?

But you are right. I'm not ALL bad. And I'm allowed to grow on this planet, right? Sometimes I wonder if I really have made progress. I haven't made any changes based on the things that I've learned. What changes have I truly made from attending church, reading scriptures, visiting life coaches, going to naturopathic doctors, watching The Secret, and The Secret Messages of Water and the like?

Okay, that's not entirely true...I know I've made small changes...sigh...

I realized something yesterday, though. I hadn't noticed it before and if you'd accused me of it I would have denied it vehemently.

I caught myself in the middle of a "If-When" conversation. I couldn't believe this! I actually had the linear thought process realizing that I was putting my happiness in the hands of materialistic goods. If I had the nice home, if I could travel, if I could achieve the physical perfection that I know my body is capable of, and on and one...Holy cow!!

Me?

I never thought I was guilty of this kind of negative thinking! I, who knows perfectly well that temporal things do not bring me happiness. I, who also knows perfectly well that I choose my own happiness. Quick, who can I blame??
I am in need of some serious repentance. Only God can change this crazy person.
Wanna know what's on my fridge?
"I don't suffer from insanity...I enjoy every minute of it!" (magnet)}

So, for the past few days I've been contemplating, What's so bad? Or in other words, count your blessings.

I think I will. And if I'm insane, then I'm going to just enjoy every minute of it.

P.S. I want you to know that I know that wanting/having material things is not inherently evil, I just misplaced my source of happiness, is all.

First Week of School

When I realized that the kids would be starting school in a few weeks, I realized I had forgotten what it was like to have them gone. I had just gotten so used to doing everything with them and not worrying about things like homework and field trips and packing lunches.

First, I panicked. They help me so much with Lily so I can do things around the house, how would I get those things done if they weren't here? Then I started to think of all the messes they make...and realized with a slow grin...there just might be less to do if they weren't here.

Does anyone remember my room growing up? My house is about the same. I can usually do a good overhaul clean but the day-to-day stuff...well, sigh, I am not a very disciplined person. And housework requires discipline.

My sister-in-law, Carlene, keeps a lovely house. It always looks neat and tidy and organized. She proclaims it is because she only has one child. You know and I know that she's just being nice.

So, I've issued myself a challenge:
I am going to become a disciplined woman!

I sat down and broke down what would need to be done in our home to make it clean on a regular basis. Each day has a set of tasks and 2 loads of laundry. This is my laundry schedule:

Monday Blues (jeans and darks), Tuesday Towels (and sheets), Wednesday Whites, Thursday Reds (any colors), and Friday is catch up day. I've been doing this for a year and it works pretty well for me.

This way, I'm not overwhelmed with the whole house and if I am, then I have a starting point for that day.

Well, this week was the first week of school. We had done well transitioning our kids from the summer hours back to school hours over the last couple of weeks. They start bathing, etc. at around 7 p.m. and by 8:30 p.m. lights are out. That's the goal. '
*FYI our kids get on the bus at 7:20 a.m. so that's why the early hours.

So, how did I do during this week? Pretty good! The kids got to school on time with breakfast and lunches packed and we even read our scriptures as a family. Today was the only day we didn't read because we all overslept. Which affected everything else.

I'm so excited about this school year. I really want to volunteer more at the school and help the teachers out. I plan on swimming 50 miles before the year is over. James, you inspired me when you said you were going to do a triathalon. Jess and I have been talking about that for years. I found one for next May that I think we can do.

I've been swimming at 5:00 in the morning for 2 weeks until I pulled my shoulder a little. It's better now, so I should be back in the water soon. It's so funny, I feel like an athlete while I work out but as soon as I get out of the pool or step off the elliptical machine and see myself, it jars me to see my body. So different than what I think I am. Who is that? I just feel really motivated to reach certain goals right now. Life is just too short to waste it.

Hope you all know I love you so much.